Heavy Metal Softball

Some Bragging Rights From Our Summer 2008 Visalia City League Campaign!!!

At the end of each league season, some recognition is always given to those individuals who contributed to the team in some way. The following categories -- most real, some intended for a few laughs -- are mostly from the offensive part of softball; some are just plain offensive! (Have a little sense of humor, guys! Don't get defensive. Get it -- defensive! Oh, never mind....)  So, for what it's worth, here we go:

Visalia City League, Thursday Night, summer 2008
2-7-1 record:  No team award; MVP selected solely by offensive/defensive points 

Offensive Categories --

Most Plate Appearances:  Mike Lujan (42)

Most At-Bats:  Mike Lujan (38)

Most Runs:  Mike Lujan (15)

Most Singles:  Mike Lujan (19)

Most Doubles:  Frank Fletcher (3)

Most Triples:  Wes Avery (4)

Most Home Runs:  Bryan Phillips, Steve Stafford (tie, 3)

Most RBIs:  Steve Stafford (15)

Most Walks:  Steve Stafford (5)

Most Sacrifices:  Mike Lujan, Bryan Phillips, Steve Stafford (tie, 2)

Highest On-Base Percentage:  Vern Amaro (.640)

Highest Slugging Percentage:  Bryan Phillips, Steve Stafford (1.053)

Highest Batting Average:  Vern Amaro (.652)

Most Hits:  Mike Lujan (23)

Most Single-Game Points:  Steve Stafford (31)

Most Offensive Points:  Frank Fletcher (84)

Defensive Categories -- (Sorry, but no defensive stats were kept this league)

All of which leads to, if the above stats were used primarily in making our choice...

Most Valuable Player (Visalia City League, Men's D-Blue, summer 2008):  Frank Fletcher (84 offensive/defensive points) 

And for our special categories...

Most Non-Appearances (regular members):  Matt Soares (8) (Once again, Where In The World Is Matt Lauer...er...Soares! is a new Thursday evening sports segment showing primarily at Plaza Park!  Just kidding, of course, big guy!  Bryan Phillips was a distant second (4), while Vern Amaro and Steve Stafford took third (3).  Some others also were considered, even though their physical bodies actually made it to the games!)

Perfect Attendance (regular members):  Donny Aguiar, Frank Fletcher, Johnny Lopez, Mike Lujan, and Joaquin Perez (All 10 games; gold stars to everyone!)

Most Memorable Performance:  In our eighth game of the league season, we played a team that goes by the name Team X -- unfortunately for our opponent, it was our own Steve Stafford who made a brand name for himself!  On this night, Steve went 4 for 4, with 2 singles, 2 home runs, 6 RBIs, plus scoring 3 runs himself.  His individual offensive output was 31 points, nearly half of his entire league total!  Like I've been saying lately, big green guy, stay angry!  Remember, keep that familiar mantra in mind for future games:  Hulk smash!       

Greatest Increase in Batting Average from Last League (spring 2008; minimum 5 games):  Wes Avery (+.125, from .375 to .500) (Lee Garcia came in second with a +.123 increase; Vern Amaro was third with a +.088 increase.)

Biggest "Plunge" in Batting Average from Last League (spring 2008; minimum 5 games):  Rich Avery (-.245, from .541 to .296) (Johnny Lopez came in second with a slightly smaller -.067 decrease; Mike Lujan was third with a -.036 decrease.)

Best Player Quote:  "...#$@%...."  (attributed to several players, after being reminded about wearing the "O-Fer Shirt"!)  

Best Acting Performance by a Player/Manager:  Drum roll, please...Vern Amaro!!! (11th time in a row!  An eleven-peat!  Incredible!  Can this person run the career table!  This is for impersonating, once again, the second baseman -- and spokesperson -- of a pretty darn-good softball team!  By the way, were there any other eligible candidates on the team?)

100 Points Plus Club:  Vern Amaro (1994 T.C.L. 130 pts./1999 T.C.L. 109 pts./2001 T.C.L. 103 pts./2002 T.C.L. 140 pts./2003 T.C.L. 106 pts./2004 T.C.L. 110 pts./2005 T.C.L. 103 pts.); Rich Avery (2000 T.C.L. 129 pts./2004 V.C.L. 102 pts.); Wes Avery (2005 T.C.L. 129 pts.); Matt Beltran (1999 T.C.L. 104 pts.); Gordon Caudle (2000 T.C.L. 120 pts.); Kurt Chambers (2004 T.C.L. 100 pts.); Frank Fletcher (1994 T.C.L. 115 pts./1999 T.C.L. 169 pts.*/2000 T.C.L. 134 pts./2002 T.C.L. 146 pts./2003 T.C.L. 113 pts./2004 T.C.L. 111 pts./2004 V.C.L. 112 pts./2005 T.C.L. 134 pts./2005 V.C.L. 109 pts./2006 V.C.L. 111 pts./2007 V.C.L. 105 pts./2008 V.C.L. 102 pts.); Gene Hitt (1994 T.C.L. 108 pts./2000 T.C.L. 138 pts./2002 T.C.L. 121 pts./2005 T.C.L. 100 pts./2005 V.C.L. 106 pts.); Mike Lujan (2005 V.C.L. 101 pts./2006 V.C.L. 113 pts.); Rene Regalado (1999 T.C.L. 109 pts./2000 T.C.L. 120 pts.); John Souza (1994 T.C.L. 122 pts.); Steve Stafford (2006 V.C.L. 106 pts./2007 V.C.L. 100 pts./2008 V.C.L. 103 pts.); Art Tabacco (2005 V.C.L. 116 pts.); Nelson Vieira (2002 T.C.L. 114 pts./2004 T.C.L. 112 pts./2006 T.C.L. 114 pts.) 

*[record for highest league total] 

Heavy Metal Softball rocks!  And I'm not joking here.  You've been a great bunch of guys to play side-by-side with, men! All kidding aside, I was really proud of our efforts, most especially the consistent team attitude displayed. I tip my cap off to all of you, as I know some of you come to play despite conflicting personal schedules, various aches and pains, balancing family and friends, and putting up with my managerial decisions. And so, in the meantime...keep rockin', guys -- and stay healthy for our next campaign!